What We Can Learn From Our Dogs
My ears picked up, listening to the very insightful Eckhart Tolle during the week.
On the topic of how our companion pets (dogs, cats) ground us. Enable us to be in the present. And how we forge such strong bonds with them.
I have gone from someone who as a child, jumped up to the highest part of a settee and perched there, shaking with nerves, if a dog entered the room. It still totally perplexes my mother that I have become a dog lover!
I didn't set out to be a dog lover, it just somehow happened, when we got dogs a few years ago. But on reflection, of course, it didn't 'just somehow happen'. It could have been entirely predicted.
Back to Tolle...
You'll most likely have heard of 'The Power of Now', Tolle's famous book first published in 1997 with over 30 million copies sold?
Well, in 2005 he wrote 'A New Earth: Awakening to your Life’s purpose'. He describes the book as presenting readers with '..an honest look at the current state of humanity'.
No small undertaking! And totally in 'my vibe'! Anything to do with the bigger questions of our time pulls me in.
Oprah Winfrey describes the book as 'One of the most valuable books I've ever read'.
They teamed up to produce some recordings where they took listeners through the 10 chapters of the book, in a pretty down-to-earth conversation each week (Link given below). I am SO glad to have been recommended this podcast by a wonderful fellow Executive Coach, Tracey Webb (link below). I've listened to half of the series so far, and I love how Oprah 'lands' the ideas so well. In a no-nonsense way. She's a stickler for truly understanding something, not letting it hang in what I would describe as some 'philosophical or spiritual ether'. If she doesn't quite get what Eckhart is saying, she'll keep going with questions, until it really dawns on her. And often she will say 'Ah! I now really understand what that means! Wow!'
Listeners also call in, to ask specific questions related to their understanding of the concepts and application to aspects of their lives.
A questioner in Week 4 (Chapter 4) asked:
"Since I've been an owner of a dog I find myself so much more in the present. My question is - why am I naturally so much more present with animals than I am sometimes dealing with people?"
A question I sometimes ask myself.
And the answer?
Dogs (like other animals - I also think of horses) are not caught up in thinking. Their mind is not busy thinking - i.e. analysing, judging, sorting, remembering, anticipating, labelling, problem solving.
They are present in the now.
Tolle says that dogs are "..at a stage of consciousness prior to the arrival of thought..." and "that state has certain similarities with the state of presence, which is the state of going beyond thinking…... in some ways dogs are more connected with Being than we are".
The growing popularity of Mindfulness perhaps attests to our yearning to re-find our ability to just 'be'. To be in the present moment. To be in a state of consciousness where we're grounded, aware of what is happening round about us, and in us. Aware of our aliveness and the aliveness round about us. In Presence.
Our mind, or ego, so resists this. We want to be constantly thinking! Our mind sees 'be-ing' as a waste of time, a distraction, something frivolous, when we should be - being productive, busy, achieving, 'do-ing something' to - solve problems, make progress, make a difference, achieve a goal.
And there is absolutely nothing wrong with do-ing things in life. In fact, it's necessary. But....we've almost made 'be-ing' extinct in our culture. We've driven it to the point of extinction.
And so, it's only natural and life-enhancing, to want more of it.
I offer you a challenge, if you are a busy person, caught up in a busy culture at work, at home, and not enjoying it. Perhaps feeling ground down by it.
Can you view a moment or two of Being, as the most important part of your day?
Can you choose it when you are at your busiest? Exactly at that point? And say to yourself: 'To pause, to breathe, to be aware that I have a body, to be aware that I am alive, that I am part of life, life is all around me - is THE single most important thing I could possibly be doing in this moment?' And after your pause, your recognition of life, carry on with what you were doing.....
This is the shift I am practising. To turn the tables on something I swallowed whole at one point - namely, 'Gotta do, do, do. Gotta complete. Gotta do it well. Doesn't matter if it's not your thing, just learn it and do it and do it to perfection!'
So, in moments in my day (often associated with being with my dog, because she has a PhD in this!) - I find myself thinking 'Oh, just be. Breathe. Relax the body. Big out-breath. Relax my face. THIS is what life is about. This is my life, right now. I'm in it.'
And from that calmer, more grounded place, I go back to what I was doing.
Nature gives us these opportunities too - moments of awe, wonder. Even 'soft fascination' in Nature, where our attention is gently absorbed in noticing, seeing, smelling, hearing. Big, fat invitations to be in the present.
And being in the present isn't always a bed of roses. Nature isn't always beautiful and joyous.
Eckhart speaks to this also in Chapter 4: 'Being fully present with the situation as it is now' is key, he says. Then 'go from there'. Have that as your base, that you are aware, you are choosing to be with the difficulty.
I think where we get out of kilter - as we face life's challenges (however personal and seemingly small, or collective and hugely overwhelming and despairing) - is when we want to 'think' our way out of the challenges i.e. problem solve, analyse, label, judge, ascribe, predict.
Mindfulness practices are excellent at enabling us to 'stay with the difficult'. We learn to not turn away or suppress or depress something that is hard to bear. We learn to gently turn towards it, modulate its strength and vividness, and be kind to ourselves as we do so. Often, the pain changes. It might change in terms of bodily sensations. It might change in terms of movement - becoming less intense, fading away, then fading back in again. Whatever....it turns out not to be so scary after all. And we move through it. In ways that our Left Hemisphere couldn't have foreseen.
In conclusion, dogs and all beautiful animals, are wonderful teachers to us humans, who are often caught up in frenzied thinking and doing.
We yearn for peace and presence and aliveness in the moment.
Dogs show us the way. They have never left that place of presence.
They don't 'think', says Tolle.
By this he means they don't get caught up in the past, or the future, or caught up in problem solving, worrying, critiquing, rationalising, judging. They also don't judge, analyse or label us and our behaviour.
Tolle has a wonderful description of dogs - our 'Guardians of Being'. Isn't that gorgeous? They help us to 'be'.
(My little Border Terrier has lain beside me for the whole time I'm been writing this. Mostly, I think her objective is to keep cool on a hot day. Sleeping. Getting up occasionally to stretch, then back to sleeping, on the rug, or in her bed, head hanging out of the bed. An occasional eye on me. I thank her for her presence; each glance at her either made me smile, or just calmed me, in a non-thinky way....)
...'Til Next Time, Go Well
References
Eckhart Tolle's book (2005): A New Earth: Awakening to your Life’s purpose: (The book obviously covers SO much more than I have referred to here. I have taken just one little snippet, one little slither)
https://eckharttolle.com/books/
Tracey Webb, my thanks: https://www.linkedin.com/in/traceyawebb/ Check out Tracey's upcoming offerings, for leaders looking to take a conscious pause (I just know these will be amazing spaces): https://forms.office.com/pages/responsepage.aspx?id=DQSIkWdsW0yxEjajBLZtrQAAAAAAAAAAAAN__tiqmyFUNTYzNk9aQkZSSVk0VzVCTkpTTE1USFE4Ny4u&route=shorturl)
Listen to Eckhart and Oprah's conversations (from 2008, but re-released on Podcasts in 2019):
Apple Podcasts - Episodes 1 and 4 as examples:
Spotify Podcasts - Episodes 1 and 4 as examples: